If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Randomize
