grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
