That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
