I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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