honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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