You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize