the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
