We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize