Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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