Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
