guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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