..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
