either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
do nipples grow back?
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