I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
