I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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