Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize