Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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