To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
