how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
FUCK WHALES
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
