More tranny stories later!
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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