omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
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