It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
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