It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
love makes seman taste better
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
