Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
