My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
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