Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
