I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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