Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Alive.
So much puke
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
