i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
