Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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