whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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