yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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