Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
