Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
