I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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