my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
