the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
