in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
do herpes really smell.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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