I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
