just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
