you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize