Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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