The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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