Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
did you get engaged???
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
