SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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