in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
