just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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