Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
