Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Randomize
