It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
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